Inspiration

So Christmas is done and we’re counting down to 2014. I personally feel as if getting here has been a giant effort and these few days off until I return to work on 2^nd January are for me a well-earned break. Don’t get me wrong, 2013 was an amazing year: I did get married* after all. Still, this is the right time for some personal reflection and thinking about the direction I want to go in in 2014. There’s certainly a lot for us to do. We are saving up for a deposit to buy a house early in 2015 (yes we’re good at planning at least!) and both of us want to make our next career move very soon. But that’s not what I mean.

I need some inspiration – something to motivate me to be the best I can. And because of that I have decided for the first time in a few years to do some New Year’s resolutions.

First things first – I’m going to sign up to Dry January. I do and have always drunk too much and while I have no regrets I feel fast approaching middle age and a thickening waist-line are strong hints that the Universe is cancelling the overdraft on my misspent youth. I hope I’ll develop some good habits. I have found as time moves on that alcohol stops being the lubricant of a vibrant social scene and rather becomes the solvent dissolving good moods, a good night’s sleep, and willpower. Time to kick that into touch!

That brings us on to number two. Much as I reject the superficial youth-and-beauty obsession that pervades a lot of gay culture in particular it is easier, I admit, to reject it whilst thin and toned. Hence the diet plan. To get down to my ideal BMI it appears I would need to lose 50lbs (22kgs). Now, to be fair I have an athletic frame, broad shoulders etc and have found it relatively easy to pack on a bit of muscle – which makes a BMI something to be treated with caution. However, weight needs to be lost in no small measure so it’s a strict regime of diet and exercise for yours truly. You can check my progress; to motivate myself a bit I’ll be putting my vital statistics on future missives.

 

Third, I want to do more research. I did a master’s level research degree and my dissertation was on the psychosocial development of gay and bisexual men. Not a prize winning effort by any means but one thing it did open my eyes to was the relative lack of research into LGBT issues. I mean, there is no consistent academic definition of homosexuality, which means the research that has been done is not easily comparable. Plus there is a huge focus on younger gay people and, inevitably, sex. There are a lot of questions out there; and since the answers relate to me (and I’m my favourite subject) answering at least one of them is something I’m keen to do.

 

Last, and most importantly it’s about being better. Being introverted I notice that the first thing to get dropped when things get stressful or busy are people. I really want to make sure I put in the effort to be a good husband, a good friend, a good colleague. I want to be able to look back on 2014 and be sure I was there for people. Still, being better also means doing the things that make me feel I’m doing the things I need to do to feel I’m being a better person – a promise to myself that whatever the context or area of my life I’m putting in the effort. I’ve never really felt inspired to do the best I can and this year I’m determined not to let anything get in my way.

Happy New Year!